Why are Tanzania husbands so proud of beating up their wives?

Just few days ago I was on my way going to a friend of mine, while on the bus I heard a very famous artist from Tanzania being interviewed about his musical career, this interview also involved questions associated with family history. Among the questions the radio personnel asked was “Have you ever beaten your wife?” with pride he said yes, but at least at one point he regrets it. I remember being told that, evil will continue if someone good continues sleeping. This is the exact reason why I want to us to examine this whole situation:

At my point of view this is the question I would like to ask today “Do Tanzanian men get married for the pleasure of beating up their women or what?” I don’t mean that all men do this, but most of us are aware that a large number of husbands in Tanzania have the tendency and on one case or the other have been involved in beating up their wives. I know that most men out there might oppose me on this case, but honestly speaking in your hearts you know that this is what you do. You can say that I am not a married man and I shouldn’t be talking about this, but trust me, I have seen and experienced a lot more than you can imagine.

When you have had an argument with your wife, the only solution you see before your eyes is to beat her up. I don’t understand where you get the power that permit you to do this from, I mean sometimes you might find that the man and his wife are in the same age, but still there is a beating and lack of respect. If you knew that you were going to have trouble with her, then why did you get married on the first place? Was it because people told you that, if you get married you will be respected? Was it a forced marriage, because you had her pregnant while satisfying your own lust? I know that most men in Tanzania say that a married man is a respected man, this is the stupidest idea I have ever heard. Does it mean that if you are not married you don’t get respected? Is it the reason why you force yourself into marriage, just because you want to be respected? There are so many unmarried men out there and they are highly respected, so I don’t see this being the excuse at all. Sometimes most men are the ones making the mistakes and since their wives are speaking up against it, they think that they have all rights to their bodies to the extent beating them up. How can men be so cruel? Don’t they have the sense of morality in them? Women have come to the point whereas they feel like they are in a prison. Their entire freedom, respect and rights to be a woman have been taken away from them. Sometimes women are trying to make a better decision that is at benefit to all, but men live them with no choice. I know that you are a man of your own ways, but when you chose to get married you also made the decision to compromise things, just as your wife did. You didn’t marry your wives so that you can treat them like slaves, you married them so that both can enjoy and share the company and support of one another.

This is supposed to be the woman who loves and adore you; the same feeling should be expressed back. Your wife is your partner and the person you are to spend the last period of your lifetime with, how can you treat her like garbage? Men pretend to be the ones with feelings, but don’t you also think that your wife has feelings as well? Don’t you think that her views should also be expressed? What is it that makes you think that you as a man you have the right to do this? To be honest this is more than a tragedy to humanity and nation as a whole especially when human rights exist in the modern world. Men in Tanzania have lost control over their marriage and respect to their wives. There are better ways to solve arguments in relationships and beating up your wife isn’t among them at all. Tanzania married men have got to stop this kind of behavior and women must stand up for their rights as wives and respected women. Women don’t get caught up with cultures and traditions because I know that before most of you enter into marriages you pass through certain teachings. You are told that if your husband beat you up don’t run away, but stay. I surely tell you this, if a man is violating you, don’t just sit there and wait for your death to come, find solutions to problems. Just two weeks ago there was a report on the news about a man who had cut his wife’s hand just because of jealousy which wasn’t even true. So you as a Tanzania woman are you going to wait until your neck is sliced of?
It’s about time Tanzania husband change their attitude toward their wives if there is going to be any better marriage. Women as well respect your husband. The thing about being in a relationship is that you should be willing to compromise for the benefit of both. When you enter into a marriage you agree to compromises and sacrifices, therefore wife and husbands in Tanzania should get this into their brains. Find things that you both agree on. Don’t be selfish and greedy. You have to know that you are united as one, and therefore it is the duty of both to ensure that each is satisfied. Beating up your wife doesn’t teach her a lesson that is cruelty.